In the excitement of getting engaged, Ryan and I started talking about what we might want to do for our wedding pretty much right away. Having never concretely discussed it before, we thought this was pretty blank slate. That is, until we realized that we were very clear about what we didn’t want. Very, very clear. Like, I don’t want to cry before walking down the aisle because I am afraid “the show” won’t go off perfectly (heard it). I don’t want bridesmaids performing choreographed dances to really obscure rap songs (seen it). We know a groom who didn’t talk to his mother for 2 months after his wedding because of things that transpired. Wedding planners who treat a wedding rehearsal’s importance as being on par with North Korea not having nuclear weapons. I don’t think we recognized it but our experiences really had an effect and the effect was us screaming “we don’t want that!”.
It was Negative Nancy wedding planning.
It was good though- we needed to clear what we didn’t want in order to get to what we did. Once we did that, details came together in incredibly quickly because, at the end of the day, our priorities list is a short one.
1) Start the day unmarried, end the day married
2) Have the people who have supported and love us present
3) Scotch & Champagne
4) Celebrate the city we live in and love
5) Spend within our budget
So with those 5 things as a filter, “wedding planning” is pretty well set. We love hosting dinner parties and we are really excited to host a big one in a space that we adore with food from one of our favorite restaurants. I’ll wear a pretty dress. I’ll kiss the guy I love. I’ll hug the heck out of my parents and cheers with my best friends. The other stuff? If it doesn’t contribute to our Top 5 list, I ain’t got time for that.
With one exception: We all know my Excel skills and we all know I didn’t make that formula intense spreadsheet that is our wedding budget. I do and always will have time for shoes and God bless the man I am marrying for knowing that and allocating a line in the budget exclusively for high heels.