My Father’s Daughter/The Time We Ruined Christmas

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We have teased my father for years about “the year he ruined Christmas”. Long story short, my stepmom and I were gushing about how much we love the movie White Christmas when Papa G offered up this little gem of trivia: “Ya know, Bing Crosby used to beat the crap out of his wife.”


Well, last Saturday night, I proved once and for all that I am my father’s daughter.

Scene: Lincoln Park Zoo, African Ape exhibit, watching a big Gorilla move around

Nina (to Ryan): This makes me so sad about the baby gorilla.

Lady Standing Nearby: Baby gorilla? Where’s the baby gorilla?

Awkward pause.

Nina: Um, well, um…it’s not here anymore.

Lady: Where is the baby gorilla? Where is it?!

Nina: It is, um, no longer at the zoo. It’s gone.

Lady: The baby gorilla! Where did it go? To another zoo? I want to see the baby gorilla!

Nina: It’s not…it went… It died. The baby gorilla died. It’s dead.

(Pan to two small children standing at her feet.)

“Mommy? The baby gorilla DIED?! It DIED?!”

Ryan: We need to get out of here. Immediately.

End scene.

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