True Story: My Cat Has an Anxiety Disorder

adminUncategorized%s Comments

I am not even kidding.

If you recall, we’ve been having some behavioral issues with Luna Bell.  When she was at the vet for a checkup this week, I asked the vet about it.  She asked a lot of questions (Is it only when outside people come into your home?  Has anything changed in her life in the last few months?) and after I explained that yes, dinner parties are problematic, yes, Ryan has been gone for work a lot and we saw her little paws sweating, the vet had a diagnosis:

Luna Bell has an anxiety disorder.

What the wha?!

Thought 1: My poor LB!  Thought 2: Am I seriously having a conversation about pet anxiety?!?

Apparently, changes in LB’s environment throw her for a loop, she can’t deal and so she “lashes out irrationally”, i.e. latching herself onto people via her teeth.

Don’t worry- there is a spray or a diffuser that we can plug in the wall that will emit pheromones that will calm her down.  Kitty Xanax, if you will.

In all fairness, she gets it honestly.  Ryan and I aren’t exactly “easy going” people- there’s a fair amount of anxiety going on at all times.  Oh my god, I gave my cat anxiety, I create an anxious environment.  How am I ever going to have children???

Shit- we live on Lake Shore Drive.  What if traffic gives Luna Bell anxiety???  Should I be closing the blinds around 5 o’clock?

Maybe I’ll just get a few of those diffusers, position them around the apartment, calm us all down a bit.  Because I swear, for as much as I cannot believe I’m having a conversation about pet anxiety, I really cannot have one about pet therapy.

Silent Protest

adminUncategorized%s Comments

Ryan left yesterday for an extended business trip.  So, naturally, Luna Bell decided to stage a silent protest to express how she felt about him being gone for a few weeks.  I totally get the logic- “if the man can’t get to his suits, how can he go do biz’nass?”.

Smart kitty.

Goal Line Glory

adminUncategorized%s Comments

An hour and thirty-seven minutes later and I completed the Soldier Field 10 Miler by sprinting on to Soldier Field to cross the finish line at the 50 yard line.  Running through the tunnel onto the open field, people cheering and hearing the announcer say my name was one of the coolest experiences- short of being in the NFL, who gets to do that?!?  Goal Line Glory, indeed!

Not one to be left out of the action, Luna Bell experienced her own Goal Line Glory the second we got home by taking a nap on the new stadium blanket we received at the conclusion of the race.  Tough life that cat has.

“Duh” of the Day

adminUncategorized%s Comments

My Dad sent me an email today with a link to WebMD’s list of “Foods You Shouldn’t Feed Your Cat“.  Since I am very interested in keeping Luna Bell alive, I took a look at the article.

I’m sorry, someone with a medical degree wrote this?  You mean that if LB looks like she has a headache, I shouldn’t give her an Advil and a Bloody Mary and tell her to suck it up?  I was waiting to read that LB’s love of carbs was frowned upon, or that Ryan needs to lay off feeding her so much wet cat food.  Alcohol, human medication, liver, onions, garlic and grapes was really all the insight WebMD could provide?

Better head to the kitchen- the kitty dinner I was preparing of wine-braised liver with sauteed onions and garlic and some grapes and Xanax for dessert apparently isn’t going to cut it.  Dry cat foot, it is.